Relationship Advice: It’s Not Just About The Wedding
You’re getting married! Fantastic! We know that you’re excited and eager to get started on your wedding planning journey! But, we also want you to remember that although you want to have an epic celebration, it should never come at the cost of the peace and harmony of your relationship. After all, a wedding - as wonderful as they are - is just one day, but a marriage is for a lifetime! So, here’s a few tips to smooth out the process and stay focused on what’s truly important!
Have an Initial Brainstorming Session
You and your fiancé might have entirely different ideas when it comes to planning and hosting a wedding and reception. The point of a brainstorming session is to see each other's ideas/expectations in a free form, non-judgmental way. So get some paper and pens and write down every idea and expectation you’ve entertained for your wedding. You might find that your ideas naturally grow, and evolve as you share them, maybe even coming to a place somewhere in the middle. This is your starting point! You can even make it into a fun date night… just open your favorite bottle of vino and make (or order) a charcuterie platter before you get started! No one does their best work when they’re hungry!
Start Talking Guests lists
This one might take a while and can at times be a little emotional! Between both of your - and your family’s - expectations, and the opinions of your friends, it’s easy for a guest list to get out of hand! So, expect to create more than one list, and be prepared to refine it, maybe more than once, so you can create a reception with the vibe and experience you’re after, without breaking the budget! Also, the number of attendees will directly influence your venue and pretty much every other budgetary consideration.
Set Your Budget… And Stick With It!
We get it, you both want your wedding reception to be the ultimate celebration of your love, and the start of your new lives together! And, we think that’s fantastic! But, the reality is that you will have to make priorities and possibly a few adjustments when it comes to your reception. After all, you don’t want to start your lives together paying off a mountain of debt! So, pick the things that are most important to you, like having a wicked DJ and photo booth, wink, wink, and dispense with the things that may be less impactful like wedding favors or other small décor elements.
Take Time to Reconnect
We know there’s a lot going on, but don’t forget to spend some time away from the wedding planning, and take some time to remember why you’re getting married in the first place. Go for an evening walk, go out to brunch, go for a bike ride through the city, take a dance class together or simply snuggle on the couch and look into each other's eyes. Your relationship is the most important thing! So focus on your biggest wedding priorities, be willing to let a few things go, enlist help from your friends and family to reduce the workload, and remember that some of the things you're fretting about now will hardly be remembered by your first, fifth, tenth or fiftieth wedding anniversary!
Enjoy!
This is really the most important tip on the list! This wedding planning experience might be a lot of work, but it should also be fun! So, embrace whatever you need to, to make this experience a relationship enriching one! If any element is creating undue stress, reconsider its place at your celebration, if you decide that it’s a ‘non-negotiable’ consider hiring or asking someone to help you… Maybe a wedding planner, possibly a super organized friend or bridesmaid, or maybe you can offset some of the workload by hiring reliable and professional wedding vendors and doing less DIY for your big day!