In the excitement of a new engagement, it’s easy to start getting excited about the details of the big day, but in our experience it’s best to zoom way out and get the bigger picture in order first! With that in mind, we hope these little nuggets of wisdom will make your wedding planning be infinitely less stressful and more enjoyable. Here’s some of the most impactful wedding planning advice we’ve ever shared!

Identify your Priorities First

Before you get started with the details of wedding planning, it’s best to sit down as a couple to discuss the kind of wedding you’d really like to have. Spend some time brainstorming about the feel and vibe you want to create at your wedding, try to visualize the perfect (for you) celebration. You should soon be able to identify what’s most important to you and what will be most impactful on your big day. Between you and your partner, try to settle on three or four ironclad priorities.

Next Up, Budget!

While generating a wedding budget isn’t the most glamorous of wedding tasks, we believe that it only comes second to setting your wedding day priorities! After all, what informs your budget? Well, your priorities of course! For example, if giving your guests a great party and dance is top priority, maybe a cocktail party style reception is the way to go. Or, if you and your sweetheart are huge foodies, and you’ve always dreamed of a multi-course plated dinner service at your reception, then maybe your guest list needs to be paired down. Or maybe, you’ve always dreamed about a wedding overflowing with lavish florals, then maybe you budget less for other décor or entertainment elements

But, whatever you decide, whether you’ve got $10,000 or $100,000 to spend, or something in between, it’s super important to decide your top priorities and how you will make those priorities work within the framework of your budget! Starting a marriage with debt up to your eyeballs, from a celebration that went way over budget, is a bad idea!

Don’t Get Research Overwhelm!

Though research is crucial when planning a wedding, it’s easy to get overwhelmed by the sheer volume of information available. Of course you want to be well informed, but not so overwhelmed by information that you feel crippled to make choices. You also don’t want to waste time researching areas of the wedding that aren’t hugely important to you, so keep referring to your priorities! Doing so will free up valuable headspace, which is imperative, as there are lots of decisions to make. So, if you’ve spent weeks researching your wedding shoes or manicure, it’s really time to make a choice and move on! 

Use Discernment When Discussing Your Wedding With Friends and Family

While it’s natural to want to share the smaller details of your wedding with your favorite people, as far as we’re concerned, the less  wedding guests know in advance of the big day, the better!  You may not realize it, but by offering up information on the details of your wedding, you’re putting your choices up for debate. And, frankly, no one else’s opinion matters as much as you and your sweethearts! So, keeping quiet about the details of the day can help to  avoid  unnecessary conflict and upset, especially where the more opinionated people in your circle are concerned. In moments of pressure, it’s best to have a handy one-liner prepared, something like, “We want to keep it a surprise”, or “You’ll just have to wait and see on the day!”, served up with a smile and boundary of course!

Ditch Anything (Even Family Traditions) That Don’t Feel Authentic For You

Just like any other kind of party, weddings generally follow a formula, and, impersonal as it can feel, that formula will be extremely helpful during the planning process. That said, there comes a time when you and your fiancé will need to decide what falls in-line with your values and priorities, and what doesn’t!  There’s no point in including matching bridesmaids dresses, having a photo booth, having formal speeches, doing a bouquet/garter toss, or dressing in the color white, if those things don’t feel authentic to you. Generally on your wedding day, nobody is going to be too disappointed that your day is a tad unconventional. In fact, they often enjoy the wedding even more because it feels authentic to you and your partner, and if they are disappointed, well, harsh as it might sound, your wedding is really not about them!